Happy New Fear!

Approaching 2011 with caution, I am nevertheless excited. But not so excited that I start making all these plans and resolutions. The only thing I have promised myself for the new year is a healthy fear of the unknown and a thankfulness for change. I think if I hold on to those two, I'll be fine. In the past, I set plans, short term goals, resolutions, diet plans, etc ... And they never turned out the way I wanted by February so I put them down. But this year, I am going on face first and fist forward. I'm ready to travel, love, live, and become successful. I am ready to branch out and become more social. I am ready to make this move and be hopeful of the positive that stems from it. I am also ready to leave the sadness, disappointed, temporary highs, broken heartedness, and rejection of 2010 and open doors to the best this world has to offer in 2011 and beyond.
And I am welcoming you all to join me in the ride. There will always be ups and downs in life but the way we handle them makes it all worth while... So when the ball drops and you raise your glass, cheers to everyone who wants to do new shit.

And always remember, its that dirty money.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Hmm, Christmas?

First off, think of the reasons why you celebrate Christmas. Because of the gifts? Because your family does? You want to win best decorated house on the block? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you have the wrong idea.
I don't celebrate for gifts, (even though they are nice), I don't celebrate because my family does, (I make my own decisions), and we can't afford decorations like that so its all good. I try to remember the things that matter most to me when it comes to Christmas. Like God, life, and an appreciation for the family God has blessed me with. I could be dead, homeless, dying of an incurable disease, or just lame but I am none of those things. I can do most of the things I want and buy most of the things I desire without being scared of what might be said about me. I am blessed.

We are ALL blessed. Beyond the stretch of our imagination. So if you can, or if you believe, take the time out on this day to take a look around you and thank God for his amazing grace, love, and peace. Its right there for you, just reach up and grab it. Understand that the hardahips of 2010 were only to make you STRONGER. Brighter. More bold. Heavier. More passionate. Smarter. WISER. And more appreciative.

And if you don't believe in God (Yaweh), then whatever your belief is, hold on to it with dear life, just as I do mine. Take the positivity with you in your daily walk. Use it as "steam to power your dreams".

"This Christmas will be ... A very special Christmas for me ... YEEEAAAAA". Lol.

Merry Christmas. ^_^

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

Better in Time...

I woke this morning to a wet Los Angeles sunrise. The rain washed away the worries of the day before and brought a smile to my face. I spent most of the day in bed, preparing for work in the evening.

I had a chance to lay, staring at the ceiling, listening to the water droplets fall on my rooftop and drip to the concrete..And my mind began to wander and wonder..

WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?
Seems as if I'm running in place, and not on purpose. I'm reaching for something and the closer I get, the further away it seems. I'm trying to remain positive tho. I'm trying to stay on my toes.

BUT WORDS FROM ME TO YOU:
Simply, DONT BECOME EASILY DISCOURAGED. There are things in this life that lead you to believe that eveything is hard, you won't succeed, and the whole world is against you...BUT this is the most untrue statement ever! Yes...THERE IS NO PITY, however, I've learned from experience that someone will always give you a leg up, you just have to be willing to take it and RUN with it. I've gone through the time where I didn't want to be helped because I thought I was MEGA-SUPER-ULTRA WOMAN and I soon fell flat on my ass. Once I realized that its ok to be vulnerable (at times), I allowed God to take control and bring people into my life to better my circumstances. DON'T B A SOUR PUSS!

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

The Long & Short of Life

We take advantage of this one thing, daily. Never thinking twice about what it really means, especially when shit is going our way.

I sit here listening to Relient K, tears rolling down my cheeks & confusion in my heart from the loss of another person from my childhood. Its a killing feeling but life must go on, right?
But why not for her? She wasn't a bad person to the people around her but a car accident ends her life? It baffles me.
Yea yea. "BE THANKFUL THAT IT WASN'T YOU." Thats what I keep hearing but does that make me feel better? HELL NO. It just makes me wonder what God is really doing. I lost my grandmother in July (& so did my ex), my aunt in September & a few other classmates earlier this year. These are all people who lived the best they could. And meant Sooooo much to my family & I.
I'm pressing on but the long and short of it is: Life is a bitch. Or a book. It begins well & as expected there's an end but never the ending you expected.

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.5

One

In time, I have realized that life sucks ass. Simple & plain.
BUT there are many joys to life that make us think that we have something going for ourselves. " We can do it!" That's what we all say. Then we wake up the next day next to a stranger with 94.7 The Wave playing loudly, the curtains half opened, empty beer bottles, & stains on the Bed Bath & Beyond sheets we stood in line for. And that's when we say "I'm going to change!" Funny thing is, we really mean it.
Anyway, we try and that makes life a hell of a lot better to live.

So I decided to publish this new blog. Its just the things I think when I think them. If you agree, follow me in this journey of nonsense and good mind sex. If you don't, go watch the Care Bears.